Toks Aruoture

Last week, I attended an interview because my company, The Baby Cot Shop, has been shortlisted in the category of Retailer of the Year. While I was thrilled for this recognition, something even more invaluable caught my attention.

I’ll back up a bit. In my previous post, as I wrote about how I was able to get out of the rut by visualising a better future. I focused on my growth as evidenced by an increase in what was seeable such as a spike in my career and living in my dream home. Today, as I pondered some more on my future, I wondered what my maturity on the inside will look like. What are the invisible traits of my future self? How will my character play out? What attitudes will I display? How will I view life? Probably most sobering; how will others describe me?

What will my older, wiser self do?

So I started to visualise. I saw her- my older, wiser self doing life with confidence and grace. I listed more adjectives to describe the phenomenal woman I am becoming. As the day progressed, I received guidance and correction from her. I wanted to mindlessly go on social media at one time and she said, ‘I don’t do that.’ I had an opportunity to moan and gripe and she shook her head- “we don’t whine, we create solutions.” The question I found myself asking as I journeyed on was “what will my older, wiser self do?”

Meet your Future Self

We all have an older wiser self, that’s who we are becoming daily. Have you taken some time to imagine what he or she looks like? Think about it, many of us spend our time visualising our future, and we no doubt imagine ourselves as a better wiser person than we are now. Instead of daydreaming, visualise. The difference? Daydreaming is just wishful thinking with no real plans to become that person. Visualising, on the other hand, invites you to walk on an actual path that leads to the vision you have in your head.

Embrace the present and the future

Back to the award interview. I walked out feeling energised because I recognised the immense personal growth I have experienced in the past year. You see, this was the second time I had been shortlisted for the award. Exactly a year ago, as I left the interview, I did so with regrets of what I could have said better. I berated myself and replayed the scenario several times each with an improved ending. This year? None of that. Instead, I opened my heart to embrace the present and the future outcome. Now I understand that I am exactly where I am supposed to be, and my future will play out exactly as it is supposed to- whether I win the award or not. I am becoming her.

Measure your growth

What’s interesting to note is that you are in a state of growth- if you weren’t, you wouldn’t be reading a blog on personal growth. I think that we are so used to measuring our growth using visible measuring sticks such as an increased bank balance, a new job title, or a bigger house. The truth is you are growing but probably not measuring it. Take time to compare who you are now to who you used to be. Get acquainted with your future self, then start to walk the path that leads to becoming her.

becoming-yopur-future-self

Don’t miss this one!

My next post will be on a subject I am currently being gingered by- cognitive dissonance.
There are a number of obstacles in life that can be avoided if we look inside us. When I stopped to do so last week, I found a big one lurking which is my need to feel at peace and not deal with disconcerting thoughts.

Join me next week, or sign up to receive my newsletter so you don’t miss it! Have a great week!

5 Responses

  1. “whether I win the award or not. I am becoming her” – I love this one Toks. It’s what I describe as surrendering and letting go of the ‘how’. Thanks for always being a blessing!

    1. Thank you Aji! I felt empowered as I wrote that line, the realisation that we are always evolving is a liberating one. Thanks to you for your thoughts!

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